FINDING ONE’S WAY HOME

Genesis 35:1-15
Bob Bonner
March 4, 2007

Frank Warren is the editor of the book The Secret Lives of Men and Women: A Post-Secret Book. After a troubling period in his own life, Frank handed out 3000 self-addressed stamped postcards to people on the street, asking them to anonymously mail him their secrets. This project began in 2004. To his surprise, the cards started pouring in. He doesn’t have to hand out cards anymore. He has received over 100,000 cards, many of which are works of art in themselves. This project eventually led to the development of a website called, Post-Secret.com, where you can confess your sins or tell your deepest secret anonymously.

Two of those returned postcards tell the human story. One postcard had an old picture of a Santa Claus with two boys on his lap. On the picture were written the words,  “I wish my sons would contact me.” A second postcard was one where a man had taken a picture of his hands praying, and written on the picture: “I don’t know how to go back to God, and I want to more than anything else in the world.” Both cards shared a common theme: the passion to finding your way back home. One from a father’s perspective who missed his sons, and the other from a lost son who could not find the way back to his heavenly Father.

The human story has been one of struggle to get connected by finding our way back to our real home, that place deep in our souls where we can relax with God. Why does this have to be such a struggle? One reason has to do with the natural rebellion that lies deep within the human heart. We don’t want to go home where we might have responsibilities. We would rather live like the prodigal son, foot loose and fancy free, but who also had to experience the hard lessons of life before he came to his senses and realized that there is no place like home, even if one does have responsibilities to fulfill. Furthermore, once we learn to “be at home” with the Lord, we discover that the responsibilities were not something to be feared or rejected, but rather something to be enjoyed and embraced. 

Another reason we find it difficult to find our way back home is that we are easily confused and distracted, and before we know it, we are just plain lost and don’t know how to get home to a real relationship with God, one where we feel forgiven, loved, accepted and approved...embraced.  The good news is that if we want to come home, but cannot find our way home to God, God will come to us.  That’s what John 3:16 is all about. For God so loved the world [that’s you and me] that He gave His only begotten Son [that’s Jesus] that whoever believes [or puts their trust] in Him will not perish but have everlasting life.

Another example of God seeking after us when we have been distracted and lost our way back home is found in Genesis 35, our passage for this morning. This chapter follows the disaster of chapter 34, that came about as a direct result of Jacob’s failure to fulfill his vow to God that he would return to Bethel to worship God if God would provide, protect, and return him safely home to Canaan. And God had done that by the end of Chapter 33. By then he was safely in the land and extremely wealthy, healthy and powerful. But Jacob either forgot or ignored his vow to return to Bethel and set up his home in Shechem. In turn, this led to Jacob’s daughter being defiled and the slaughter of an entire family clan, representing maybe a thousand people known as the Hivites, all their men, women and children. This all happened because Jacob would not fulfill his vow to return to Bethel. 

No sooner does the dust settle from this disaster than God comes looking for Jacob, and grabs hold of Jacob’s attention. He wants to show Jacob the way home.

Let’s pick up God’s coming after Jacob, in verse 1. “Then God said to Jacob, ‘Arise, go up to Bethel and live there, and make an altar there to God, who appeared to you when you fled from your brother Esau.’ So Jacob said to his household and to all who were with him, ‘Put away the foreign gods which are among you, and purify yourselves and change your garments; and let us arise and go up to Bethel, and I will make an altar there to God, who answered me in the day of my distress and has been with me wherever I have gone.’”

In response to God’s command, Jacob comes to his senses, steps up as the spiritual leader of his family for the first time and makes immediate plans to head to Bethel. He wants a new beginning with God. Furthermore, Jacob demands that the family begin a fresh start with God right along with him following their abhorrent slaughter of the Hivites. But before they even begin their travel to Bethel, Jacob knew that if they desired God’s blessing on their lives, they all had three things they needed to do first:

First, put away their foreign idols. These foreign idols were not just the ones that Jacob’s wife, Rachel, had brought with her from her father’s house. But additional ones were probably picked up along the way during their seven-to-ten- year stay at Succoth, as well as some of the booty they collected from the looting of the pagan city of Shechem. Idols not only were believed to have power to these people, but even if you weren’t religious, they were precious in that many were made out of gold and jewels. So you didn’t pass them by. You collected them! Jacob probably knew his family had been collecting them for some time, but he never told them to dump them. He has permitted them to collect and possibly even worship these idols in the past, but that has now come to an end. It was time to jettison these spiritual stumbling blocks. 

Second, he tells them to “purify themselves.” This is an expression that has a dual usage in Hebrew, of which both apply here. One points to taking a bath, in honor of whom you are about to visit. In this case, God. It’s second usage is a spiritual one, pointing to confession or admitting to God that you have been wrong so as to receive His forgiveness. In the New Testament we are told in 1 John 1:9, that if we admit to God our wrongs, “He is faithful and just to forgive us our wrongs and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” He will forgive, but first comes admission to our wrongdoings.

Third, Jacob commands them to change their clothes. The changing of garments, in Scripture, ceremonially speaks of the commitment to change one’s ways, habits or even complete lifestyles. By giving this instruction, Jacob is signaling to his family that there are going to be some immediate and necessary changes made in their lives. Once again, in the New Testament, Paul tells us in Ephesians 4 that we are to put off the old life and put on the new. This is a picture of what the Bible calls “repentance” or making a turn-around in the way we do things. We turn away from doing things we now know are wrong, and turn toward doing that which we now know is right.  

By this time, everyone in the family realizes that if they are going to survive living together and living amongst the Canaanites, there had to be some changes. Hence, verse 4 says, “So they gave to Jacob all the foreign gods which they had and the rings which were in their ears, and Jacob hid them [or buried them] under the oak which was near Shechem. As they journeyed, there was a great terror upon the cities which were around them, and they did not pursue the sons of Jacob. So Jacob came to Luz (that is, Bethel), which is in the land of Canaan, he and all the people who were with him. He built an altar there, and called the place El-bethel, because there God had revealed Himself to him when he fled from his brother.”

No longer is this place called just “Bethel, the house of God,” but Jacob renames it, “El-bethel, “God of the house of God,” pointing to the realization that it took an extra move of God to bring Jacob back to this place. God was not only the boss, but the loving Father showing him the way home. And by now, Jacob was glad to be home, or reconciled with God. By renaming this place, Jacob was declaring to his family that God rules and that Jacob was intent in following after God. Jacob never wanted his family ever to forget what it took on God’s part and how much God cared about them, as he, himself, had been so prone to do in the past.

But then, as so often happens, a real life event crashes this homecoming that puts a damper on everything. “Now [during this time that Jacob was fulfilling his vow at Bethel] Deborah, Rebekah’s nurse, died, and she was buried below Bethel under the oak; it was named Allon-bacuth (which translated means “the oak of weeping”).”

Deborah was Jacob’s mother’s nurse who was there for Jacob from the day he was conceived, to his birth, and throughout all of his first 90 years of life. She no doubt looked after and cared for Jacob. They would have been close. This was a horrible loss for Jacob. By now, his brother Esau has probably already told him that their mother had died while he was away. That meant that Deborah was the last and closest parent-like female adult in his life. Hence, he understandably grieved much over her loss, and this sorrow was the reason for naming her grave, “the oak of weeping.” 

The biblical record does not tell us exactly when she rejoined Jacob, but there is a hint here, that she may have rejoined him sometime after Jacob’s reunion with Esau. Deborah was very old when she died.  Her 180 years bridged the long era of the three patriarchs, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. 

An oak tree was considered a sacred tree in the ancient world. Typically, oak trees were designated as shrines, landmarks, or dwelling places. Hence, by burying her near this oak tree, Jacob is highly honoring Deborah in her death. 

Contrast to this brief epitaph to Deborah, a handmaid’s life, is that of her mistress Rebekah’s epitaph. All the wives of all the patriarch’s are given a biblical epitaph, except Rebekah, because of her deceitful ways. Even though a devout believer, she is notably being corrected by Moses by his leaving out the details of her death in Scripture. One might think that it is contradictory to claim Rebekah as being devout and deceitful. It is not. She was a true believer, but like all of us, when we fear that things spiritually are not going the way we think God wants them to, we sometimes take matters into our own hands. We don’t seek counsel before we act, we just act. When we do, we usually make matters worse. Such was the case with Rebekah, hence Moses’ omission of the details of her death.

After being faced with this loss, God comes again to meet Jacob. His timing is perfect in that what God had to say to Jacob must have been an encouragement and comfort to him after experiencing the emotions that go along with feeling the loss of a loved one. God’s words in these verses enabled Jacob to regain perspective as to his life and calling as a patriarch of the family. It enabled him to look forward, in hope and to get on with life “Then God appeared to Jacob again when he came from Paddan-aram, and He blessed him. God said to him, ‘Your name is Jacob; You shall no longer be called Jacob, But Israel shall be your name.’ Thus He called him Israel. God also said to him, ‘I am God Almighty; [“El Shaddai” not from Hebrew “mountain” as Ryrie states, but “breast” as picturing a woman who gives nourishment as well as birth] Be fruitful and multiply; A nation and a company of nations shall come from you, And kings shall come forth from you.’”

Whenever you read of God giving us one of His names or someone else highlighting one of God’s names in Scripture, take note. The Spirit of God is trying to tell us something. This is true with this name mentioned in verse 11, “God almighty.”This name for God, “God almighty” in Hebrew is “El Shaddai.” It is a very significant name for God, if you want to better understand who God really is. The term “El” is short for “Elohim” and refers to God as being “strong, mighty, and powerful as the creator of our world.”

The word, “Shaddai” comes from the Hebrew word “shad.” Until recently, Hebrew scholars thought this word came from a root word for strength. If so, it doesn’t easily fit the contexts in which it is used or make any sense. However, a better and more recent understanding of the word reveals that it probably comes from the root word in Hebrew for breast. It is invariably used in Scripture for a mother’s breast, symbolizing that she is not only the one who gives birth to a child, but it is through her that food is transmitted to the infant. Hence, she alone becomes not only the giver of life, but the sustainer of life. In the beginning, she alone is the comforter in the infant’s life. She is the one, in times of fear or danger, who holds her child close to her and provides protection and a sense of security.

When we put these two words together, “El” and “Shaddai” we get a more complete and beautiful picture of who God is. With this name, we receive a rare glimpse at the female side of God, the mother-God. Merely mentioning the possibility that God has a female nature sends some Christians over the edge. If that concerns you too, please look in your Bible as to what God says about Himself, back in Genesis 1:27.  There, we read about man and woman being created in the image of God. Women portray something of the very nature of God to the rest of us. Although God is sexless, He does possess and reveal both a male and feminine side. Primarily, He has chosen for us to view Him as our heavenly Father; however, He does not want us to think He doesn’t possess any of the characteristics which He created in woman. “El Shaddai” gives us one of the most tender, feminine pictures of God that we have in the Bible. 

To sum up, this name for God, “El Shaddai” declares that God is the creator, exhaustless sustainer, strengthener, protector, and supplier of life, who personally comforts those who trust in Him. Only He can satisfy and nourish to the degree that His children have need. He is the one who pours His very life into the frail and weak of heart who trust in Him. He is the one every heart longs to run home to!  

God continues to bless Jacob in verse 12, “The land which I gave to Abraham and Isaac, I will give it to you, And I will give the land to your descendants after you. Then God went up from him in the place where He had spoken with him. Jacob set up a pillar in the place where He had spoken with him, a pillar of stone, and he poured out a drink offering on it; he also poured oil on it. So Jacob named the place where God had spoken with him, Bethel.”

What a wonderful passage of Scripture. If there is anything you hear this morning, I hope you leave here with this point. God is interested in you. He cares about you. He is looking for you to come home and to reconnect with Him. The real question is, “Do you want to come home to Him?”

While you think about that, allow me to remind you that He made you so that you and He could have a relationship. There is so much He wants to do for you if you will only let Him into your life. That’s why He came looking for you, as God did Jacob, when Jesus came to die on the cross as the payment for our penalty for ignoring God, for stiff-arming Him and for running away from Him. Jesus wants us to know that all one has to do is ask Jesus to forgive you, and to come into your life as the master, the chairman of the board over your life.

So, what’s the first step to coming home to God? It’s you making the decision as to what is most important to you. Do you want to continue living your life, with that sense of there is something more to life than this, resting on your heart? Do you really enjoy the direction your life has been heading? Or do you really want to come home to God? Do you really want to experience a vital relationship with Him? If you do, then understand that He is already reaching out to you, just as God had reached out to Jacob. You must decide that you want to come home to God.

From this passage, we see three things that were necessary for Jacob and his family, if they were serious about coming home to God and experiencing Him and His blessings in their lives. Those same three things are necessary for us to come home to God, and they all center around the entrusting of our lives to Jesus Christ. Let’s quickly review them.

First, Jacob’s family were told to put away their foreign idols. But you say, “I don’t have any idols.” You may not have the same kind of physical idols as did Jacob’s family members, but you do have idols that you worship in place of God. In Jacob’s day, idolatry was simple and obvious to detect. Our idolatry is often more subtle and difficult to detect. For us, idolatry takes on the form of attractions and distractions that motivate and master our lives other God.

The following are a few questions that might reveal some of the idols we worship or hold up as more important than God: What are the ambitions and dreams we worship? What are the values we value above all? How much time do we spend making money and making a name for ourselves? How much time do we spend with God?

Dave Roper, a retired pastor writes, “One way to identify your gods is to observe your reaction when you don’t get your heart’s desire or when that desire is taken away. You’ll know because you’ll become self-pitying and bitter instead of submitting to God and longing for [His making you into His likeness, no matter what manner He takes.]

“Another way to know your idols is to know your own thoughts, for, as Jesus said, “Where your treasure is, there your heart [mind] will be also” (Mt. 6:21). We treasure most what we think about most of the time. Our last thoughts before we sleep, our first thoughts when we awaken, our reveries throughout the day are spent on the things we treasure and trust. These are the gods, [the idols] that draw us away from God’s love....

“Is there some grief in you [of what might or could have been], some woe [or bitterness against people or God for forcing things upon you or frustration over shattered plans], a pining for that elusive ‘something more’? If so, it may be that an idol stands between you and your Lord.” 

Maybe your idol is something from your past that has hold of you, has enslaved you, maybe it has even weighed you down with guilt. If so, and you want freedom from that idol, then this next step is for you. In the Old Testament, they called it “purifying yourself.” But how do we do that? The Bible says that true repentance, a true desire to bury the idols so that we can find freedom from them so that we can return home to God, begins with admitting to God your sin, and asking His forgiveness. 

1 John 1:9, tells us that if we confess to God our wrongs, “He is faithful and just to forgive us our wrongs and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”  Or to put that in more modern terms, the Message Translation paraphrase puts it this way, “On the other hand, if we admit our sins—make a clean breast of them—He won’t let us down; He’ll be true to Himself. He’ll forgive our sins and purge us of all wrongdoing” 1 John 1:9.  But how can He do that for us? It has nothing to do with making ourselves better, but rather, it is because Jesus died on the cross to pay the penalty for our sins so that we could be forgiven by God. And once we ask for God’s forgiveness, then we have a new life with God, in Christ.

Which leads us to the third step: change your clothes.  In other words, you put off your old ways, believing that you are a new person in Christ, and begin to live as the child of God you are. By trusting in Jesus to live His life through you, you obey Him and live as He teaches you to live in His Word. As you do that, you will find yourself “at home” with the Lord.

However, be warned: You can temporarily stray from “home.” I don’t mean that you can lose your salvation, but you can wander away and sense a real distance between you and God due to returning to old ways and worshiping old idols.

If you find that happening, then return to “Bethel” with God. Repeat the steps above. Admit to God that you did wrong and accept His forgiveness once more. Then return to praying as you used to pray, read the Word as you used to read it. Ask God to open your eyes to see the wonderful things in His book and then to hide those things in your heart.

Keep this in mind: Bethel stands as a place of both new beginnings, for those who have never found their way back to God, as well as a place to begin again. For all of us, Bethel is not a one-time event. Truthfully, we must meet God there every day.

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